So it is ending once again. Another summer gone and another school year beginning. I don't know how I feel about it this year. I feel as though I always see the new year beginning now instead of in January. We grow up over the summer, we get that pent up energy out of our systems, we get a chance to be free. Then when it ends we go back to scheduled lives, academic agendas, friends we haven't seen, and lives we have put on pause. Once you get out of the "schooling" years I guess this ends too. It seems to me that we are all chasing after our lives, either trying to out win it or trying to run backwards.
Picture three people in an air terminal. The one is running as fast as they can to catch their plan. Life has gone ahead and is just passing them by while they try to catch up. Another is running backwards on the walking treadmill trying to weave through the people because they forgot to say goodbye. Life has pasted and the fellow has missed out, forgotten to say goodbye to their friend their lover their dead father or just someone living in the past. The last is the one I hope to be someday. They are just walking slowly down the air terminal to their next gate. They are striding along with life, not trying to catch up when it races forward and not trying to remake the past. They are content with whatever ends up happening.
At the end of each summer I try to evaluate my life. Have I accomplished the goals I had set, did I change, was a level of maturity reached, how can I make it through the coming year...They are all things people ask themselves, but what are the answers. Right now I feel like I'm between running backwards and feeling totally overwhelmed that I will need to let go and run ahead to catch up. That guy walking along will smile at me and think, "She'll get it right one of these days." I've met those people. The "content" people. They are so calm, so relaxed, happy to help. The models of society, the ones we need running the countries of the world, the ones we won't dearly as a friend, the ones that make it without a migraine at the end of the day, the ones who don't spend their time regretting...
Some day I will be one of those people, I'm working on it and I can say that this summer has taught me many things. It has taught me to keep working, to keep chugging along. It has taught me to follow my passions and my dreams, make them something on the top of my list, that I may need to wait for other things that seem sooo important. Get where I need to be and then think about the more "fun" things. Life is about making your life happy and fulfilled and I plan on never forgetting that truth. I love life, I love living, and I love breathing.
So summer is ending and in a couple of weeks I'll be running around "terminals". I'll be busy and scared at times, but there will be laughs shared and remembered too. School is an exciting time even if its overwhelming. All of you who are going back to high school remember that it will be over soon, anyone headed to college for the first time remember that its super fun but don't let it get ahead of you, people going back to college for a second third fourth five time remember the joys of friends and the work that will get you to those dreams, and everyone else remember all the times you have had and look forward to the new ones if you haven't found what you want find it. Be happy...until next time
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